Friday, November 8, 2013

Emma Jane's Writing

The assignment:  Write a short story where the main character discovers a secret.  Hook the reader with a great lead.  Have fun.  Use great grammar.

On Sunday afternoon while I was taking down Halloween decorations, Emma worked on her homework.  She wrote this in pencil in one draft.  She is ten years old.

Madeline rolled the cold, smooth key in her hand until she finally had the courage to slide the key into the lock; she turned the key slowly as it clicked.  As she thought, this room could have infinite possibilities, so many things could be in there and it all started when she was cleaning out her closet.

Madeline was eleven and lived in the country in a two story house with her mom and dad.  She was an only child.  Today she was cleaning out her closet full of clothes, toys and other random things.  She had just finished cleaning all the shelves when she climbed onto her footstool and found a little wooden box with a brass latch.  She climbed down and sat on her bed.  She unlatched the lid and opened it up and inside there was a key.  It was gold and worn down.  She wondered what the key was for.  She tried it on her room door, but that didn't work.  She tried it on her closet door, but that didn't work either.  So she put it back in the box and went to lunch. 

When she came back she realized that the key could go to a room that had been locked for as long as she could remember.  So she took the key out of the box and ran upstairs down the hallway to the last door.  She slowly turned the key until it clicked.   She nervously turned the knob and opened the door.  Inside there were two wardrobes, two of each play toy and two cribs.  Madeline walked slowly into the room.  She saw many pictures of her mom and dad and also saw a picture on a night stand between the two cribs of two babies that looked exactly the same.  She felt so light headed she went to go sit in one of the two rocking chairs.  The two girls looked like her.  She thought one of those babies must be her but who could the other one be?

Once she was feeling better she took the picture and walked downstairs to where her parents were reading.  She asked them who the other girl was and she got an answer.  When her parents were finished explaining, she was sad.  She had a sister, a twin sister.  She died when they were babies.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, definitely much deeper than what I was expecting. What can this girl NOT do?